


Shooting Star

by everywintersbreath



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Space, Angst, Bullying, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Permanent Injury, Self-Esteem Issues, a little fluff but mostly sad, pilot academy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-13
Updated: 2018-08-13
Packaged: 2019-06-26 14:47:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,290
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15665358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/everywintersbreath/pseuds/everywintersbreath
Summary: With a loud crash like the sound of a thousand stars exploding all around him, everything disappears.





	Shooting Star

**Author's Note:**

> read the tags for possible triggers

It’s only been a month since he’s enrolled here and Junhui’s skin is already intimately familiar with the carpet burn one can receive from being forcefully dragged into the storage closet next to the boy’s showers. 

The first time it had happened, he had been terrified, not understanding any of the words the boys hurled at him as they kicked and punched him, the crack in the door the only source of light for Junhui’s eyes to linger on. Now, he’s almost apathetic, not even crying out as the last blow comes to his stomach, the blood dripping out of his nose and mouth his saving grace against the nasty smell of the rotting provisions tucked around the corners of the room. 

One of the boys hurls a final insult his way, slamming the door behind them on their way out. Junhui would roll his eyes if he weren’t so tired. The only reason they can be this confident about it is that there’s no way they’ll get caught. Junhui might be the best student the academy’s seen in years, but the officers still don’t bat an eye when he comes to class limping with his entire face swollen. It’s so easy for the injuries to be passed off as ones he’s received from training, although Junhui knows for a fact that there’s no way the only crumbling training bot that cadets are allowed access to could deal such damage to anyone. 

Junhui pushes himself into a sitting position, wincing. They really went for his ribs this time. He’ll have a lot of trouble in the simulation tomorrow, which was probably their intention. Sighing, Junhui stands, moving to open the door when he’s met with sudden forceful resistance on the handle. Junhui bites at his lip, trying to shake the knob. Did they lock him in?

Before the claustrophobia can set in, Junhui loosens his grip enough for the person on the other side to yank it open, denying his suspicion. The guy is a little shorter than him, cheeks puffy. He’s new, Junhui recognizes him from the batch of trainees that had come in that morning. He gapes at Junhui. “Hi,” Junhui murmurs softly, awkward. 

“Uh, hey!” The guy greets, scratching at the back of his head. “I’m kind of lost and I was looking for towels. This doesn’t look like the right place though, so-”

He trails off, just now noticing Junhui’s condition. “Whoa, dude, are you okay?”

“I’ll be fine,” Junhui replies, smiling at him kindly. “Don’t worry, I’ve had worse.”

The boy stares at him, frowning. He’s a strange mix of cute and handsome, with the eyes of a tiger placed in the face of a hamster. “If you say so,” the boy replies doubtfully. “If you change your mind and decide you need immediate medical attention, I’ll probably be in the shower so I don’t know if I’ll be able to help you. If you want to try though, my name’s Soonyoung. Yell it three times at a mirror and I’ll appear behind you.”

Junhui giggles at the joke even though it’s really not that funny. “Nice to meet you, Soonyoung. I’m Junhui,” Junhui straightens up, pointing past Soonyoung. “Oh, and clean towels are in that closet. Be careful not to put yours in the laundry too often or the cleaning lady will get mad at you.”

“Hey, thanks, man!” Soonyoung says loudly, turning to bound away. Junhui wonders if he’s always this loud. 

Either way, Junhui’s first genuine smile in the last month has appeared on his face so he supposes it doesn’t matter. 

 

 

 

 

The newer trainees try the simulation before them, receiving pretty abysmal ratings for their performances. The other boys in Junhui’s group laugh at them cruelly despite having received lower scores themselves on their own first evaluations. Junhui bites his tongue, settling back and closing his eyes as he waits for his turn to come in his group. They’ve set him to go last.

As soon as it’s over, he steps out of the simulation capsule, feeling the hush in the room. “Another perfect score, Junhui,” one of the officers remarks. “Great job as usual.”

“Thank you, ma’am,” he replies immediately, picking at the sleeves of his uniform and making his way to the side where the other students are gathered. Soonyoung’s there, having stayed through his break. He gives Junhui a thumbs up. “Super cool,” Soonyoung compliments sincerely, grinning. Junhui can’t help but smile back until he’s yanked back by one of the boys. “You’re dead, Wen,” the boy snarls, loud enough for even the officers to hear.

Junhui looks down, swallowing, feeling the way the lump in his throat sinks down into his stomach. None of the officers say anything, the atmosphere heavy. “Are you serious, dude?” Soonyoung asks suddenly, standing up. “Just because you’re jealous doesn’t mean you can be an asshole. God, let’s go Junhui.”

Junhui stares at him with his jaw wide open. It’s the first time anyone’s stood up for him. He shakily takes Soonyoung’s hand, waiting until they’re in the hallway to speak. “You shouldn’t have done that,” he whisper-shouts. “They’ll hurt you too now.”

Soonyoung shrugs. “See if I let them. I didn’t take karate lessons for eleven years for nothing.”

Junhui inhales. “No, really. This place will be a lot better for you if you have friends here. You shouldn’t stick around me.”

“You’re my friend now, aren’t you? I’ll just stick around you~!” Soonyoung says innocently, giving Junhui a charismatic smile.

Junhui feels his heart skip a beat.

 

 

 

 

 

It only takes Soonyoung a week to climb up the ranks into Junhui’s group. Soonyoung’s arrival lowers the average number of weekly post-shower attacks from seven to two, his presence beside Junhui at the lunch table also stopping them from upending their trays over his head. All in all, it’s a pretty beneficial alliance.

Junhui puts in a request to let Soonyoung move into the empty bunk across from in his dorm room, Soonyoung’s presence replacing that of the last boy who had gone on a mission never to return. They joke about the room being haunted often but Junhui can’t find it in himself to truly laugh, often looking over and spotting the pair of abandoned old boots still tucked under the other’s bed.

The longer they spend in the academy, the higher they both rank up and the closer they both get to actually flying and going on missions. It’s as much as a terrifying thought to Junhui as an exciting one. He’s growing reliant on Soonyoung, the other taking care of him so thoroughly that Junhui doesn’t realize just how much he’s come to lean on him until he sees the newly posted class ranking list in the hallway, his name at the very top replaced with Soonyoung’s. 

In the past, Junhui would probably have gone back to his room to cry at his spot being taken. Now, he can’t even get upset. It’s Soonyoung, after all. As long as it’s Soonyoung, anything’s okay. When the other buries his face in the back of Junhui’s shirt later that night and apologizes, voice weighed down with guilt, Junhui only coos at him reassuringly. “It’s okay,” he says over and over again. “You deserve it just as much as I do, if not even more.”

He’s not sure if Soonyoung ever really believes him. 

 

 

 

 

Soonyoung asks him out two weeks before they’re asked to observe the new trainee flight exam, standing in the dorm room with a bouquet of weird space flowers and a big grin on his face. Junhui accepts, because how could he not, diving into Soonyoung’s arms. They spend the night watching dumb old space war movies, both of them criticizing every inaccurate detail the movies try to pass off as reality. It’s fun, it’s silly, and it temporarily takes Junhui’s mind away from the black hole it digs itself into when he thinks of the exam.

Soonyoung’s good at that, distracting him. Soonyoung distracts him up to the moment he enters the cockpit as the passenger and sits beside the twitchy pilot whose hands are too quick and too reckless. Soonyoung’s face is in the back of his mind, distracting him, even as the young pilot crashes them into an asteroid, smashing Junhui’s body between the dashboard and the seat in a way which can’t possibly turn out well for him. 

He can hear command yelling at the pilot through the communicator, can hear screaming and what sounds like something exploding, and then Junhui’s out cold.

 

 

 

When he wakes up, they tell him he won’t be able to use his arms and legs the same way he used to be able to. The woman in the med bay is apologetic, looking as guilty as if it was her who destroyed his mobility. 

Junhui just stares up at the ceiling, not even able to look Soonyoung in the eye when the other comes up, probably squeezing his hand. Junhui can’t really feel what’s going on in his hand area, but there’s definitely some sensation. “Junhui-” 

He’s bawling, Soonyoung wiping his tears away from his eyes and kissing his forehead repeatedly. Junhui knows what this means. He won’t be able to fly, never again will be able to control a ship. All of the dreams and plans that he and Soonyoung had written up aren’t going to come true. Soonyoung will take off, fly among the stars with someone that isn’t Junhui and make memories in the shadow of the sun. 

“They’re taking full responsibility for the accident,” Soonyoung murmurs as gently as he can to Junhui. “You don’t have to worry about anything, sweetheart.”

Junhui just cries harder, the numbness of his limbs feeling even stranger than pain would. Soonyoung sits beside him all night, crooning little songs and telling Junhui over and over again that it will be okay. 

Junhui’s not sure he ever really believes him. 

 

 

 

 

Over time Junhui gets used to it.

Well, as used to it as he can get. Soonyoung takes him places in a wheelchair, helps to feed him, even helps him to the bathroom. It’s humiliating in a way Junhui can’t explain, but at the same time, he feels safe because he’s always safe with Soonyoung. 

He gets a special suite from the academy as compensation for his troubles, a nice room with a view of the hangar that he and Soonyoung move into readily. It’s a bit sickeningly nice, really. Some of the boys who used to beat him up even send flowers, now withering in various vases around the room.

It’s near impossible for Junhui to change them out himself and Soonyoung keeps leaving for missions, coming back so exhausted he barely has time to help the both of them change before knocking out. Junhui’s happy that he’s been promoted, that he gets to do what he’s always wanted to, but at the same time, he misses the old days. 

He misses tumbling onto the bed together in a heap of shredded clothes and sweat, misses playing cards in the room way after curfew, misses the dumb movies and cartoons, misses Soonyoung’s attention on him. He can’t help but hate himself, hate how hard he makes Soonyoung work to take care of him.

The other never complains though, so neither does he, even when Soonyoung comes home smelling so strongly of perfume that Junhui chokes, his nose more sensitive after the accident. It takes him a while to ask about it, feeling only more ashamed when Soonyoung tells him that a female co-worker came onto him and he rejected her. He should trust him. Soonyoung would never cheat.

Still, he can’t help but feel worthless, spending his hours just sitting, looking out the window at the ships taking off and wondering what could have been if he hadn’t boarded that ship. It’s easy to be insecure when he has nothing to criticize but himself, the empty apartment the loudest when Soonyoung’s not home, the silence screaming at Junhui so loud he wants to cover his ears. 

 

 

 

 

After a few months, Soonyoung wheels him onto his ship, excitedly showing him around like a child half his age. It’s one of the only times Junhui’s left the apartment (excluding his physical therapy appointments) since the accident. He feels almost happy again as Soonyoung brings him towards the cockpit.

There’s a special seat which Soonyoung lifts him into, buckling his seatbelt very carefully and giving him a pretty smile. Soonyoung’s matured a lot in terms of physical appearance, his hair back now and face slimmer, more of the tiger than the hamster. Junhui studies his own reflection in the windscreen of the ship. He’s still pretty, but he looks rather gaunt these days, like a doll moments away from shattering into millions of pieces. Junhui swallows, looking away towards Soonyoung’s hands.

They’re extremely skilled on the controls, launching the two of them into the air before Junhui can even anticipate the sensation. He rests his weight backward, having almost forgotten how much he loves this. Soonyoung keeps looking over at him for a reaction, and Junhui smiles, staring out at the stars that he loves so much. The stars he’s given everything for.

“Are you feeling okay?” Soonyoung checks, happy when he receives an eager nod. Junhui is feeling more than okay. He’s in heaven, sailing with Soonyoung through the planets like he’d always wanted to. “Are you happy?”

Junhui nods. “I’m happy,” he replies, grinning at Soonyoung.

Soonyoung smiles back, starting to tilt the steering wheel. “Close your eyes for a moment, sweetheart.”

Junhui obliges.

With a loud crash like the sound of a thousand stars exploding all around him, everything disappears.

**Author's Note:**

> i like how this one turned out even though it's pretty dark
> 
> feedback is appreciated 
> 
> thank you for reading <3


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